[personal]: things i’m thankful for

(I just typed ‘thankful’ as two words. I am clearly not cut out for this.)

Hello, hello. Yes, this is still not a book review. I’m sorry. So, a good fren from more than 6000 km away suggested I try to blog about things I am thankful for whenever I feel too stressed out about life. Today at work, we had a long meeting and most of it was spent talking about who gets cut out of the team’s roster. At some point, I thought to myself: This is what I sold myself, my soul, and my liberal arts degree, for. It was fucking disheartening.

Coming off from that point to list down the things I’m thankful for suddenly felt like an asshole thing to do. But hey.

  1. My Job. I am thankful for having my job secured as of March 26, 2018. I’ll never know when I’ll get the boot, but when that time comes… then it comes. But for now, I have this, this job of mine which I don’t really hate. I actually kind of enjoy it. Every day, there is something new to do, something new to tinker with, something to make me feel like I’m doing something for someone.
  2. Constant Friends. These past weeks were just pure hell. I’ve never had to deal with feelings since college and then, three months into the job and I suddenly grew this fungus on my heart what the fuck. It was good while it lasted. It was worse when it ended. I am pretty sure I wouldn’t have survived any day of it without my friends who had to bear with my daily messages of pathetic woe. (It was also Peak Anxiety Episodes, so you all saved my life, actually.)
  3. New Friend. Do you know how hard it is to find a good friend at a faraway place? Like finding a needle in a haystack. I feel like one of the things that made me so miserable at my former job was because I had no one there who runs on the same frequency of crazy as I do. Finding my new friend was a miracle and at the right time, too. She’ll probably not see this anytime soon, but thanks, new friend! You helped me survive a ghosting, ulcer (literally!), and my anxiety attacks.

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